Things Stabalizing

She's on new medication, and reacting well to it. By Monday she should get ready to go back to school.

Listening to her sleeping and talking to herself is painful. The voice was tormenting her even when she slept.

So, things are supposed to go back to normal, normallacy helps a child in her position.

You know, a long time ago someone asked me why I never make assumptions about the mentally ill. Why I don't have the same view of mental illness that they thought all ex-GI's had.

A good friend of mine was hit in the forehead by a chunk of steel. He went into convulsions, he had one eye open while he jerked and jumped, and we loaded him onto the medevac helicopter, and we didn't see him for almost two months.

When he came back, he was... different, darker almost. His favorite foods had changed, even his accent had changed, and he slowly isolated himself from all of us.

Then one night he hung himself because he thought we all hated him and he was lonely.

It wasn't his fault.

Now my daughter worries that I hate her, that I think she is a horrible person, because of the things going on with her. She's so lonely sometimes, so afraid that nobody loves her anymore.

So, while there's work I could be doing, instead, I sit on the couch and hold her in my lap, watch TV with her, and let her know that I still love her.

She didn't ask for this to happen. It isn't her fault.

Personally, I can't wait to sleep. I haven't slept since Sunday night.